The B4 Blog

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Juliette's Hot

If, instead of the two people who make up the main love interest in the TV show Lost, they were instead something that lured in a support cloth for the area below your neck and above your butt, it would be called this.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Bellow? Barbie Bill Boasting Beer?

If instead of the number of days since someone last posted to this blog, it were the fear of fresh-made hornet-bread, and a dull person who always shoots one under par it would be called this.

(This one is so lame. I just wanted to see if anyone reads this blog anymore.)

Friday, September 14, 2007

Ahoy! Me hungry!

If instead of the team we're playing this Sunday (only singular, not plural), it were a description of the activity of eating crusty bread aboard an old ship, it would be called this.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Happy Trails, To You!

If instead of being what tonight's Men's Group is (8/24/2007), it were the name of a stripper's act, it would be called this...

(This one is probably ridiculously hard. I'll be impressed if anyone gets it.)

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Barthur's Baxiom

If instead of the most common word Barthur uses to express frustration, it were what you did to the tin roof of a love shack, it would be this.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Get Hyped!

If instead of being the moment we've been waiting for since last February 4th, it were a type of cheese from area code 62512, it would be called this...

To The Right

If instead of being a word used to help categorize things it were a tower that divided the nations, it would be this...

Be Bules

Once you B4-icize a word, you still have to pronounce it the same way as the original, even though its phonetic-nicity-ism-ness may have been transformed too. Changing word into bord would be pronounced "bird", and would be spelled as such in the B4 answer (you would actually spell out "bird" in your answer, not "bord" - spell it the way it sounds).
You don't have to cleverly describe words that are not in the actual B4 phrase, you just can't say any words that ARE in the phrase. So you don't have to describe a baseball as an "orb that you tap into play that has stitches" if the word "baseball" is not part of the B4 (I think Chris did this). You would probably describe Phil as "a tall queer man from Iowa" if the word "Phil" was in the B4 phrase, but that's just me - you can do it how you see fit.
Consonant-clusters can be replaced by a single "b", but they do not have to.
Replace "qu" with a "b" in all words that begin with "qu". Quiet would by buy-it, not bwhy-it. No exceptions.
Only replace the first letter (or letters) of the word in question, even if the word is a compound word. Thanksgiving would be Banks-giving, as in Art's most recent B4 - not Banks-biving.
Hyphenated words count as separate words and should each be B4-icized. Father-in-law would be Bother-bin-baw.
The most important rule: you can make up any other rule you want and even completely change any of the rules in the partial list above as long as you explain what you are doing in your B4. These rules are just the standards for starting the B4 and you can deviate any way you want. Don't you feel so free now? You can do whatever you want! You... you.... you can do whatever you want!! (that quote was a reference to the stand-up comedian whose first name he and I share and last name would be, if instead of what it is, the act of existing as the shortened version of the name of this formerly gray and currently white wizard.)